Self destruction

I'm not single... I'm attached... But I don't feel like as if i'm in a relationship... Damn!!! 2 diff lifestyles... No matter how much I try to put our lives together... I don't see it wrking out... Christmas is nearing.. I know... N I'm trying to keep myself in d mood by going to town almost everynight n listening to Christmas songs... But seriously I just don't feel it... Damn lonely if that's I'm gonna day... WTF right... Haiz... If u're single n u feel lonely maybe I can understd... But I'm fucking attached... I wrk till 10 n by d time I'm home he'll b at wrk n those days I get to be with him will be like only for like an hour or lesser... WTF!!! I so used to sticking with u... Like u're my addiction right!!! Shiaat!!! I used to be damn independent u know.. Now??? I dono whr everything went... D strong n bold gal??? What happened??? I juz need to get myself up again!!! If not it's gonna b self destruction..!!! 

how nice???? at the starting of the mth i post smth n at the end i post smth... lolx..
well oct wasn't that bad after all.. i mean besides spending loads coz of d wedding n all n running away frm cisco... HAHAHA.. d rest was fine..

well love life currently at this very second sux okay... i'm like thinking twice alrdy if i need this or shld i juz shut d fuck up n be single... i mean i really want freedom n i hate ppl controling me.. come on... i have my life to live n seriously don't live for others lor... i'm like only 20 this YR n turning 21 nxt yr... i have so many things to enjoy.. do u believe if i say i havent clubbed till today??? FUCK!!!! its not wrong to explore n hello i have my own principals n i know what is wrong or right... i've tried drinking n i didnt like it, i've tried smoking n i think it stinks.. so what d hell... i have my own likes n dislikes... FFFFFUUUUUUUCCCCKKKK...

I juz wonder y indian men love controlling their wives.. come on... d more u control d more we rebel.. n me at this age sure is to rebel.. tadz for sure... coz i m seriously not afarid of any1 in these world n its not necessary for me to love any1 too... SSSHHHiiiiTTTTTT...

SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME WONDER IF I HAVE MADE D RIGHT CHOICE... i have made many bad n good choices... so which section is this under??? hmmmmmmmm... everything seemed so good... HAIZZZ... JUST WHAT SHLD I DO NOW?????

I HATE CISCO TO THE CORE

AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..........
I FUCKING HATE CISCO OKAY... I AM CONFIRM TENDERING ON THE 11TH OF OCT 2010 AND LEAVING THIS STUPID ORGANIZATION... JUZ COZ UR STUPID MANAGEMENT SIDE GOT COMMUNICATION BREAK DOWN U GUYS R PUNISHING ME...... PAY HOLD BACK... EVER FELT THAT... THAT FEELING SUCKS OKAY...

LETS START FRM THE BEGINNING.... I DIDNT GO TO WRK FOR 4 DAYS... AND I DID FUCKING INFORM MY SHIFT SUPERVISOR N SHE FUCKING ACKNOWLEDGED IT WHICH MEANS I DIDNT RUN AWAY FRM CISCO AND I STILL CAME BACK TO SEE MY OM.. .HELLO IDIOTS USE UR BRAINS... IF I WANTED TO RUN AWAY I WOULD HAVE DONE THAT LONG TIME AGO N COME BK TO SEE THE OM... ANYWAY THAN WHEN I CAME BACK THEY TOLD ME MY PAY IS ONHOLD CAUSE I AINT AT WRK... I SAID OKAY AND MY OM PROMISED ME THAT I WILL RECIEVE MY PAY ON 5TH OCT 2010 COZ HE WANNA SEE MY ATTENDANCE... FARK... FINE... I SAID OKAY.. ON THE 5TH NTH WENT IN SO I CALLED MY OM IN HIS HP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WHILE HE WAS SLPING AT 12.10am... I DONT CARE... ITS MY FUCKING MONEY OKAY... THAN I TOLD HIM HE SAID THAT HR IS CLOSED AT THIS TIMING N EVEN IF HE WANNA HELP ME HE CANNOT DO ANYTHING... HE SAID HE WILL HELP ME OUT FIRST THING IN THE MORNING AND I SAID OKAY... WHEN I CALLED HR THEY TOLD ME MY PAY WILL BE IN ON THE 7TH OF OCT 2010 AFTER 6PM... SO I WENT TO CHK YTD... FUCKING SHIT IT DID NOT GO IN AND I HAD TO SUBMIT MY LEAVE FORM ANYWAY.. SO I WENT TO SEE MY OM...

DAMN ANGRY LA OKAY... THAN HE TOLD ME THERE WAS A BIG MISUNDERSTANDING SO NOW THEY GONNA RELEASE MY PAY ON THE 10TH OF OCT...TOGETHER WITH MY OTHER AS A SUM... SHIT... BRO'S WEDDING IS ON THE 10TH AND I HAVE GET THINGS DONE BUY STUFF AND ALL... WHAT THE FUCK ARE THIS PPL TALKING ABT... HAIZ... ANGRY...

WHAT WAS D MISUNDERSTANDING...

MY DUMB DYOM YAN UPDATED MY STATUS AS TERMINATED WITHOUT LETTING MY OM KNOW AND SENT AN EMAIL TO THE HQ.. FOR CONFIRMATION THE REPLY CAME BK TO MY OM ARU AND HE CANCELLED MY TERMINATION COZ THERE IS NO ACTUAL REASON FOR TERMINATION.. AND BY THE TIME THEY WANNA RELEASE MY PAY N ALL EVERYTHING GOT DELAYED.. I DONO WHATS THIS YAN'S PROB ANYWAY.. N YEA MY VOUCHERS.. HE KEPT N SAID IT WASNT WITH HIM... AFT AFEW DAYS WHEN I ASKED HIM HE SAID IT WAS WITH MY SHIFT SUP JOHTHI.. SO I MSGED HER TO CHK WITH HER SHE SAID NO HE HAVENT GIVE HER N I KNOW SHE DOESNT LIE REGARDING THIS KINDA MATTERS.. SO WHEN I REACHED OFFICE.. HE WAS LEAVING HOME N WHEN I ASKED HIM WHR WAS IT HE STILL GOT THE CHEEKS TO SAY ITS WITH JOHTHI I TOLD HIM THAT SHE DOESNT HAVE IT COZ I RDY CHKED WITH HER.. ON THE SPOT HE SAID '' OHH YEA I FORGT ITS WITH ME '' HOW CAN ONE RMB SMTH ON THE SPOT.. PLAYIN GAMES AH.. SHIT DOG... I REALLY HATE HIM...

I REALLY FEEL LIKE STABBING THEM STRAIGHT IN THEIR BALLS... I MEAN COME ON... IF I HAD NTH ON AND U ASKED ME TO WAIT TADZ DIFF.. BUT U'RE ASKING ME TO WAIT WHEN I HAVE MY BRO'S WEDDING... DO THIS BASTARDS UNDERSTD HOW DIFFICULT IT IS... I DONT THINK THEY DO... I REALLY HOPE THEY GO THRU THE SAME ONE DAY... COZ I BELIEVE IN KARMA.. WHAT GOES ARD WILL CERTAINLY COME ARD... N IT WILL BE BIGGER COZ KARMA IS CERTAINLY GONNA BITE THEM IN THEIR ASS... LET'S SEE WHEN THEIR KIDS GET MARRIED.. N THEIR PAY GETS HOLD HOW THEY FEEL... BITCH...

NOW I HAVE NO OTHER BLOODY CHOICE THAT I HAVE TO PAWN MY LIL BABY... ITS D ONLY THING THATS ALWAYS WITH ME N VERY CLS TO MY HEART N NOW THAT I HAVE TO PAWN MY HP FOR 3 DAYS IS LIKE FEELING NAKED... HAIZ... ITS FUCKING HEARTBREAKING... I FEEL LIKE IM TREATING MY PHONE LIKE A SLUT... SHIT... IVE GOT NO OTHER CHOICE BABY... I LOVE U MUCH MUCH BUT I REALLY GOT NO OTHER CHOICE... HAIZ... SERIOUSLY DAMN HEART BREAKING... WHN I WENT TO CHK OUT D PRICE OF MY PHONE TO SELL IT RDY I STARTED CRYING N I JUZ WALKED OFF... NVM I'LL JUZ THINK THAT MY BABY IS SICK N IM GONNA SENT HER TO THE HOSP N SHE'LL BE BK MAYBE SUNDAY MORNING OR MONDAY MORNING... I THINK I OBVIOUSLY CANT BE HAPPY WITHOUT HER... SO I'LL TAKE HER OUT ON SUNDAY MORNING BEFORE I GO FOR THE MAKE UP THINGY... HAAIIIIIZZZZ...

NVM LA.. I AM ONLY DOING IT FOR MY BIG BABY =D HE ALSO POOR THING... ITS NOT HIS FAULT TOO... I ALSO PROMISED HIM THAT I'LL GET HIM CLOTHES TO WEAR N ALL BUT I COULDN'T... I DONT WANNA GIF HIM AN EMPTY PROMISE.. SO I'LL JUZ DO IT..

hard

Yeah Yeah Yeah


Yeah Yeah Yeah

Yeah Yeah Yeah

Yeah Yeah Yeah

Yeah Yeah Yeah

Oh Yeah

Oh Yeah

Oh Yeah

Oh Yeah

Oh Yeah



They can say whatever

I’ma do whatever

No pain is forever Yup!

You know this

Tougher than a lion

Ain’t no need in tryin

I live where the sky ends Yup!

You know this



Never lying

Truth teller

That Rihanna reign just won’t let up

All black on

Black top shades

Black top maybach

I’ma rock this sh*t

Like fashion

As in goin to this Gang stop

And my runway never looked so clear

But the hottest bit** in heels right here

No fear

And while you’re gettin your cry on

I’m gettin my fly on

Sincere

I see you aiming at my pedestal

I better let you know



That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

So hard, So hard, So hard, So hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

So hard, So hard, So hard, So hard



All up on it

Know u wanna clone it

Rihanna Hard lyrics found on http://www.directlyrics.com.com/rihanna-hard-lyrics.html

Aint like me (that chick to flaunt it)

Ride this beat beat beat (like a pony)

Meet me at the top (top) top

(Getting loaded)

Who think they test me now?

Run through this town I shut it down

Brilliant resilient fanmail from 27 million



And I want it all

Gonna take more than that

Hope that I know you got



I need it all

The money the fame the cars the clothes

I can’t just let you run up on me like that (all up on me like that) yeah



I see you aiming on my pedestal

So I think I gotta let u know



That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

So hard, So hard, So hard, So hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

So hard, So hard, So hard, So hard



[YOUNG JEEZY]

???



Where them girls talkin trash at? x2 Where they at? x3

Where them bloggers at? x2 Where they at? x3

Where your lighters at? x2 Where they at? x3



So hard, So hard, So hard, So hard





That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

That I, I, I, I'm so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I'm so hard

So hard, So hard, so hard

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah (That rihanna range just wont let up)

So hard, so hard, so hard

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph, I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

'Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

'Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away

BROKEN.

You shut me down in shades of grey

That ricocheted into endless, matter
Your lucid eyes expecting me to stay
You could not comprehend how, shattered i was

I lie awake at night
And think about the golden rule of love
You’d better be prepared to pay the price
So look before you jump
Don’t look back, baby
Don’t look back, baby
Don’t look back

Love has broken you
Love has broken me

Invisible to naked eyes, but this euphoria
Can’t be mistaken
Cause i undress you in my mind,
Kaleidoscopic images all waken

I lie awake at night
And think about the golden rule of love
You’d better be prepared to pay the price
So look before you jump
Don’t look back, baby
Don’t look back, baby
Don’t look back

Cause love has broken you
An’ love has broken me
Love has broken you
Love has broken me

There is no beginning, there is no end
Eternity is my new born friend
Vane green images and story eyes
Amazing grace with electro lines

Hey, could you do that again
Cause you feel me up time and time again
Never need to draw the line
These moments don’t need to be defined

I’m in a steady euphoria
If i told you the story
I’d bring you to your knees
Never knew what i was really missing
But now i do and i’d been digging press in

Don’t look back, baby
Don’t look back, baby
Don’t look back

Love has broken you
Love has broken me
Love has broken you
Love has broken me.

='(

In the space between what’s wrong and right,

You will find me waiting for you.
All your fortresses go down in the night.
To the dawn I’ll see you through.

‘Cause I know, that you know,
You’re all over me now.
And it’s clear, it will show,
Your curtains will close.
But if your heart is cold, my sheets are warm.
I will shelter you through the storm.
I will shelter you all through the storm.
The answers aren’t so easy to find,
The questions will have to do.
‘Cause I’ve lost myself deep in your life,
My only fix is you.

‘Cause I know, that you know,
You’re all over me now.
And it’s clear, it will show,
Your curtains will close.
But if your heart is cold, my sheets are warm.
I will shelter you through the storm.
I will shelter you all through the storm.

Saying what I am, what we are,
It’s a start towards the truth.
Taking my breath with each day,
All I can stand in my heart it’s you.

In the space between what’s wrong and right,
You will find me waiting for you…

Stomach

D size of my upper stomach is 28, than mid tummy is 29, n hip is 34 n now my current weight is 56!!! I have put in weight again... Hopefully I can loose it all by oct 3 more mths sia...

shkae em haters off

Wake up in the morning


Turn up my alarm and

Get a stretch and yawn in

Start shaking haters off

Start shaking haters off

Yeah



Go and brush my teeth and

Get something to eat get

Fly as I can be and

Start shaking haters off

Start shaking haters off



Its like the job I never get a break from

Because haters never take a vacation

Really I don't even mind

If they're hating all the time

Guss I’m doing something right

Still around at forty nine



Wake up in the morning

Turn up my alarm and

Get a stretch and yawn in

Start shaking haters off

Start shaking haters off

Yeah



Need another life just

Doing what I like but

Every single night I

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Yeah



Shine so bright its hard to miss me

I love to keep haters busy

That doesnt’ do what I want

And they only do what they can



When you see me don’t hesitate

Please look for a reason to hate

Kelly Rowland Shake Them Haters Off lyrics found on http://www.directlyrics.com.com/kelly-rowland-shake-them-haters-off-lyrics.html

It’s so much motivation

For me to be a good thing you can’t stand



Its like the job I never get a break from

Because haters never take a vacation

Really I don't even mind

If they're hating all the time

Guss I’m doing something right

Still around at forty nine



Need another life just

Doing what I like but

Every single night I

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Yeah



I’m everything you want to be

So go ahead and hate on me

You’re motivation is what I need

So be my guest, please hate on me



I’m everything you want to be

So go ahead and hate on me

You’re motivation is what I need

So be my guest, please hate on me



Wake up in the morning

Turn up my alarm and

Get a stretch and yawn in

Start shaking haters off

Start shaking haters off

Yeah



Need another life just

Doing what I like but

Every single night I

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Steady shaking haters off

Yeah

GROWN ASS WOMAN

I'm so grown it's silly
I'm so above fussin', callin' and cussin'
Playin' little games at 5:30 in the morn'
Said it's a shame and a pity,

How everybody throws up,
That they're a grown up,
They don't wanna call me breathin' on the phone.
And I don't understand how he was ever with you, 'cuz he with me now
I'm so grown and intelligent
It's clearly evident that you're a child,
And honey playtime is not right now

But, I'm not gonna get on your level,
Not gonna pull me off my cool.
I'm such a grown ass woman,
I don't got the time to play high school.
You need to get on my level,
'cuz right now you just look like a fool.
I'm such a grown ass woman,
I don't got the time to play high school.
I'm so above all of this and you.

You see, that im so grown it's silly,
I'm so above fussin'
But if I wasn't,
I'd probably be halfway to your house.
But I'm such a damn lady,
I'm not gonna mess up my hair,
Tryin' to go there,
Break a damn nail or a heel tryin' to knock you out.
But you would have a problem, no doubt
No doubt.


But, I'm not gonna get on your level,
Not gonna pull me off my cool.
I'm such a grown ass woman,
I don't got the time to play high school.
You need to get on my level,
'cuz right now you just look like a fool.
I'm such a grown ass woman,
I don't got the time to play high school.
I'm so above all of this and you.


I could go back and forth,
Yelling screaming with you,
But be the bigger person,
Is what I choose to do.
I'm his everything now,
All that he never knew,
He could have all he wants with you,
So get a clue,
So get a clue,
He's done with you.

But, I'm not gonna get on your level,
Not gonna pull me off my cool.
I'm such a grown ass woman,
I don't got the time to play high school.
You need to get on my level,
'cuz right now you just look like a fool.
I'm such a grown ass woman,
I don't got the time to play high school.

I'm not gonna get on your level,
Not gonna pull me off my cool.
I'm such a grown ass woman,
I don't got the time to play high school.

I'm so above all of this and you.

You, you

 * THANKS TO U MARE NOW THIS IS ON REPEAT MODE *

So much for passenger service

GeoTagged, [N1.33021, W103.85404]

And since ytd there was brazil match, my honey love n I wore our brazil tshirt!!! Yippy!!!

RAAVANAN!!!

I think this is like an awesome movie... WOOOHOOOO!!! juz love it... 1 of the best tamil movies i have watched i guess... and 1 of the good tamil movies with proper 3D effects and didnt have much fakes & the hero died!!! WOOOAAHHH!!! i agree rai looked good in this movie.. AWESOME is what i would say...

MARE LESS 1ST DAY WAS ALREADY A NIGHT MARE!!!

1st night mare was still around.. with our usual grp... everything was fine till mare left for her road trip... DAMN!!! 2nd night shift. mare wasn't ard rdy. she has left for thailand. our team was d same ppl but only RIC was mee sien.. hahahahah!!! she was okay but she wasn't as protective as mare. mare always stood up for her ppl n even best no issues in the team one. haizzz. we r desperately waiting for ur return babe!!! come bk quick!!!!

firstly, at our first gate, all of us were still feeling okay n trying to cope with d fact that mare wasn't ard, but still had the rest of us together. so we went in, i was doing front loader and all everything was going smooth and than the roving team came in. yeap, ramanan n colin & everything was going smoothly till we were down by 3. so while waiting for the pax, mee sien went to the toilet n yeap was running the machine the other side. suddenly i heard music frm my phone n i panicked coz i realised i didnt off my phone. so i turned behind, yan was doing mbs n i told her that i didnt off my music n my batt is left with only 20%... u noe what the fucker colin said, he said i was very noisy in the gate n he took down my name n ID. FUCK!!! i cnt fucking understd what was his fucking prob. and i gave him la coz i noe i didnt do anything wrong, and even worst he wasn't my RIC. so what if he was a 4 bar deployment officer for bravo??? FUCK... that day was my shift. Charlie team's shift, which means whether u got 10 bar or not also u don't come n talk so much to other team ppl... n show off.. FUCKKKK!!!! i was fucking pissed off n wen mee sien came bk she say nvm juz leave it... neva fucking stand up for me... in my heart i was like if only mare was here!!! she would have shut that guy up!!! my other team mates too didn't understd what was the guy's bloody prob... well actually nobody did!!! DAMN!!!

and than we did equipment chk, this we did it well la, we like shared the load to finish fast so that we can slp earlier n have longer break.. last 3 gates left and it got screwed coz 1 of the flight's got delayed and THEVAN was there. DAMN!!! all gates were to be chked properly by mee sien and damn!!! the time got delayed!!!

aft that once i break finished and we did flight and all... our last flight senthil was told to go n help a roving team & guess what there was a huge misunderstding btw them!!! DANG!!!

well thank God its off days the nxt 2 days which means d more to miss mare is lesser!!! yeay!!! today is alrdy the 2nd off day which means back to wrk tmr on 1st morning 22 june!!! 7 more days till her return... & pay day... DOUBLE THE JOY N HAPPINESS!!! i know my pay is gonna be fucking lil this mth!!! i cnt be suffering like that everytime la... wah lao.. i need to wrk properly nxt mth wthout mc n all sia... no money is so annoying!!! DAMN!!!

No mare for d nxt 1 week plus ;(( damn!!! Usually it's me who isn't there now is mare!!! O gosh!!! I hope today we don't have d abandoned feeling sia... Hahahaha!!! Missing u love!!! We've planned to go for see sha once she is back... So yea... Can't wait!!! Excited!!!

Weight loss

Yeauyyy !!! I got myself a weighing scale today n guess wad now i'm 55kg!!! 5 more to loose!!! 3 mths I've lost 5 kg unknowingly which means knowingly I can loose more!!! Yeay!!! First step to a successful weight loss!!! My bet with Jason will not be lost!!! I will have a flat Stomach on bro's wedding 10/10/2010!!! Even if I have to go to d slimming centre!!!

partners in crime meeting for a new crime plan???

well today i didn't really do much... woke up cleaned my cupboard... only clothes still got shoes n bag... but still cleaning up my clothes make my cupboard look so neat... hahahahaha...
went to town with laven... shopped n hang out for awhile..

than went to meet jason n watch karate kid.. karate kid was awesome... i wouldnt mind watching it again for another 10 times... like seriously la.. i loved it.. lucky i bought tickets for karate kid compared rather than others... YeaY... d smith's family is juz awesome i think father like son =D that's what it's gonna be =D

HOW I WISH THIS WAS DAMN TRUE... BUT I THINK ITS ONLY TRUE WITH GOD'S LOVE AND NOT MAN...

Hey Yeah, yeah,

See I’ve been to a place, called hell on earth,
When your body’s the same, but your heart really burns,
That kind of pain, is more like a curse,
Yeah, yeah,
I was down on the ground, and the tears wouldn’t come,
I can not make a sound, and my voice wouldn’t budge,
And nobody around, they assumed I was down,
Yeah, yeah,
And I got ready to close my eyes, kiss my chance at love goodbye,
Here comes hope like a ray of light, it was your baby saying,

No, you ain’t gotta climb this mountain alone,
Just take my hand, and I’ll fight for you when you can’t be strong,
The worst part is over
The worst part is over
I’m here to hold ya
The worst part is over

See the measure of love, ain’t when your up,
It’s about who sticks around, when you can’t see the sun,
And you’ve proven to me, someone I can trust,
Fantasia The Worst Part Is Over lyrics found on http://www.directlyrics.com.com/fantasia-the-worst-part-is-over-lyrics.html
Yeah, yeah
I swear I got ready to close my eyes, kiss my chance at love goodbye,
Here comes hope like a ray of light, it was your baby saying,

No, you ain’t gotta climb this mountain alone,
Just take my hand, and I’ll fight for you when you can’t be strong,
The worst part is over
The worst part is over
I’m here to hold ya
The worst part is over

You’re the extra bit of faith when I’m giving up,
That little boost of strength when I’m against the wall,
In every way you’ve shown, you’re the definition of love,
(Taught ya everything, oh) (Touch you everyday, oh)

No, you ain’t gotta climb this mountain alone,
Just take my hand, and I’ll fight for you when you can’t be strong,
The worst part is over
The worst part is over
I’m here to hold ya
The worst part is over

See I’ve been to a place called hell on earth, that part is over

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

I can't tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there's a steel knife
In my windpipe
I can't breathe
But I still fight
While I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It's like I'm in flight
High of a love
Drunk from the hate
It's like I'm huffing paint
And I love it the more that I suffer
I sufficate
And right before im about to drown
She resuscitates me
She fucking hates me
And I love it
Wait
Where you going
I'm leaving you
No you ain't
Come back
We're running right back
Here we go again
It's so insane
Cause when it's going good
It's going great
I'm Superman
With the wind in his bag
She's Lois Lane
But when it's bad
It's awful
I feel so ashamed
I snap
Who's that dude
I don't even know his name
I laid hands on her
I'll never stoop so low again
I guess I don't know my own strength

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

You ever love somebody so much
You can barely breathe
When you're with them
You meet
And neither one of you
Even know what hit 'em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling
Yeah them chills
Used to get 'em
Now you're getting fucking sick
Of looking at 'em
You swore you've never hit 'em
Never do nothing to hurt 'em
Now you're in each other's face
Spewing venom
And these words
When you spit 'em
You push
Pull each other's hair
Scratch, claw, bit 'em
Throw 'em down
Pin 'em
So lost in the moments
When you're in 'em
It's the rage that took over
It controls you both
So they say it's best
To go your separate ways
Guess that they don't know ya
Cause today
That was yesterday
Yesterday is over
It's a different day
Sound like broken records
Playin' over
But you promised her
Next time you'll show restraint
You don't get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game
But you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave
Out the window
Guess that's why they call it window pane

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

Now I know we said things
Did things
That we didn't mean
And we fall back
Into the same patterns
Same routine
But your temper's just as bad
As mine is
You're the same as me
But when it comes to love
You're just as blinded
Baby please come back
It wasn't you
Baby it was me
Maybe our relationship
Isn't as crazy as it seems
Maybe that's what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is
I love you too much
To walk away though
Come inside
Pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don't you hear sincerity
In my voice when I talk
Told you this is my fault
Look me in the eyeball
Next time I'm pissed
I'll aim my fist
At the dry wall
Next time
There will be no next time
I apologize
Even though I know it's lies
I'm tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I'm a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I'mma tie her to the bed
And set the house on fire

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

SO DAMNN TRUE...

MINE WILL B 10

I SERIOUSLY WISH U COULD UNDERSTAND THIS EMOTION THAT I AM GOING THRU ROGHT NOW

THIS IS GOING THRU MY HEART

IF ONLY I COULD DO THIS TO U!!!

Sunset!!!

I cannot resist tking pix of all tiz beauty even thou my phone doesn't have like d best cam in d world ;)))

IMPERFECT

I saw you yesterday
And I heard what you had to say
All those ugly ways you
Think about me, yeah.

But I know it's okay
Gonna keep this smile on my
Face, hey don't change the way
I feel about my inner being.

'Cause I won't let 'em dim my light, and I'm holding
My head up high,
Even though my exterior
Is not impeccable to you,
I don't know if my
Rose is right,
But I'm gonna keep living
My life to fame, my name.

And darling,
I don't care what they say
'bout me.

Imperfect; that's all
That I'll ever be;
And god knows that's alright with me,
'Cause I know there's
No one greater
And everybody's imperfect,
When you tryna live in harmony, but the song of life
Is out of key;
Just be perfectly imperfect.

Imperfect, imperfect, imperfect, imperfect.

As I look at the TV screen,
Internet and magazines,
So much insecurity surrounds me, wish I could change some things; gotta steal with my self-esteem,
Folks so superficial
Makes it hard to just survive.

'Cause I won't let 'em dim my light, and I'm holding
My head up high,
Even though my exterior
Is not impeccable to you,
I don't know if my
Rose is right,
But I'm gonna keep living
My life to fame, my name.

And darling,
I don't care what they say
'bout me.

Imperfect; that's all
That I'll ever be;
And god knows that's alright with me,
'Cause I know there's
No one greater
And everybody's imperfect,
When you tryna live in harmony, but the song of life
Is out of key;
Just be perfectly imperfect.

Imperfect, imperfect, imperfect.

I may not walk like a super model, or look as flawless as they do; I don't know where you get off judging,
'cause I'm imperfect just like you.

So I don't care about your status, so I'll swear up to here I've had it;
Ain't trying to win no beauty pageant, 'cause in my heart is all that matters.

Imperfect; that's all
That I'll ever be;
And god knows that's alright with me,
'Cause I know there's
No one greater
And everybody's imperfect,
When you tryna live in harmony, but the song of life
Is out of key;
Just be perfectly imperfect.

Imperfect, imperfect, imperfect, imperfect.

Oh...

That's all
That I'll ever be;
And god knows that's alright with me,
'Cause I know there's
No one greater
And everybody's imperfect,
When you tryna live in harmony, but the song of life
Is out of key;
Just be perfectly imperfect.

Imperfect, imperfect, imperfect, imperfect, imperfect, imperfect,
Imperfect, imperfect.

O yes!!! It's been very long since I updated!! Wrking n falling sick n wrking has been my cycle ;))) kinda broke right now!!! Arrrggghh!!! Left wid $12 till 20th than Jason will pass me $100 to survive... Damnn!!! $4 per day ??? How to survive??? Shit!!!

RIGHT TO DREAM!!!

I lay awake sometimes

Scared to close my eyes

And I wonder where I left myself

I lost the will to fly

And the night melts into morning

Still it's cold beneath the sun

'Cause the fire in me's languishing

And I'm too frozen to run

Every once in a while

There's a distant glimmer of hope

I find

Somewhere deep inside

Someone strong still resides

And I know she's gonna be fine

In time

'Cause you see

I've got a lot to dream

There's more than this for me

An angel lands with broken wings

Warms me with his eyes

And the ice that sheaths around my heart

Unravel as he smiles

See I grew up locked in sorrow

So I learned to block the pain

But I won't give up tomorrow

'Cause I've come to life again

Every once in a while

There's a distant glimmer of hope

I find

Somewhere deep inside

Someone strong still resides

And I know I'm gonna be fine

That's right

'Cause for real

I've got a right to dream
There's more than this for me

But I keep on going 'cause

Every once in a while

There's a distant glimmer of hope

I find

Somewhere deep inside

Someone strong still resides

And I know she's gonna be fine

In time

'Cause you see

I've got a right to dream

There's more than this for me

PASSION!!!

SEXY!!!

SO DAMN RELEVANT!!!

SO DAMN TRUE!!!

Movie Marathon

yeap ytd was movie marathon day we watched 2 movies in a row, first was iron man 2 at 6.25pm n second sura. i feel both worth watching. especially iron man! awesome!!!

i seriously enjoyed the movie by laughing my hearts out. the graphics & effects were awesome too. like one of the best movies. & those who said this movie isn't worth watching, i think they can all go hang themself. seriously!!! i think its worth watching 10 times!!!!

& as for sura. hmmmm. not too bad. i could laugh my kidneys out coz of vadivelu n vijay's comedys. hmmm ... went for a 9pm show!!! had my ben n jerry's =))) hahahahah!!! had a sick but gd day =)))

ANGELS CRY

I shouldn't have walked away

I would've stayed if you said

We could've made everything OK

But we just

Threw the blame back and forth

We treated love like a sport

The final blow hit so low

I'm still on the ground

I couldn't have prepared myself for this fall

Shattered in pieces curled on the floor

Super natural love conquers all

'Member we used to touch the sky

And

Lightning don't strike

The same place twice

When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry

True love's a gift

We let it drift

In a storm

Every night

I feel the angels cry

C'mon babe can't our love be revived

Bring it back and we gon' make it right

I'm on the edge just tryin' to survive

As the angels cry

I thought we'd be forever and always

You were serenity

You took away the bad days

Didn't always treat you right

But it was OK

I do somethin' stupid

And you still stay with me

But you can only go for so long
Doing the one you claim to love wrong

Before too much is enough

You look up

Find your love gone

And

We were so good together

How come we could not weather

This storm and just do better

Why did we say goodbye

'Cause lightning don't strike

The same place twice

When you and I said goodbye

I felt the angels cry

True love's a gift

We let it drift

In a storm

Now every night

I feel the angels cry

C'mon babe can't our love be revived

Bring it back and we gon' make it right

I'm on the edge just tryin' to survive

As the angels cry

Baby I'm missin' you

Don't allow love to lose

We gotta ride it through

I'm reaching for you

Baby I'm missin' you

Don't allow love to lose

We gotta ride it through

I'm reaching for you

Lightning don't strike

The same place twice

When you and I said goodbye

I felt the angels cry

True love's a gift

But we let it slip

In a storm

Every night

I feel the angels cry

Oh babe, the angels cry

Yes now I'm on my way home aft OT.. Hahaha!!! Have been early for wrk this past 2 mornings ;))) yeay!!! Spoke to more members frm d team... Yeay!!! More frenz ;) m very tired!! Juz got my pay... Bought my honey love timberland wallet hope he appreciates it ;) it caused $98 I bought myself Victoria secrets shampoo conditioner n perfume!!! Yeay!!! All cheap cheap $18 only ;)) Tmr wanna go tekka... Do threading thn see how la eat thosai maybe feel like eating lor...

Wondering thoughts ;)

Well I've realised that Ive been blogging lyrics as my post in my blog posts n pictures in my tumblr post... Hahaha... Well thats cause they either somehow link or signify my life's current situation or I juz like them... ;)

I've actually decided to wrk even harder now. I need more money ;) well we humans r Neva satisfied with wad we have??? Not true it isn't enough that's y we will Neva be satisfied. Anyway thought if doing OT on my off days. If my honey boy can do it so can I ;) motivation eh? U could ask me... Hahaha yea sorta. I realised that he has been wrking without any off days non stop. Make use of the damn OT pay since they're paying me for it. Planning to slp in office for my 2nd night this time with saras. Let's see how lor. I wanna make d maximum Amt of cash for d mth of may without takin MC . Hopefully I can.

I suddenly feel like I'm missing epiphany alot. I don't know why. Maybe cause no matter wad she was my foundation ;) hmmm planning to go over on mother's day n aft that bring mummy out ;) havnt decide whr exactly. 1st muz buy her smth to wear than bring her out lor. See how first la. No plans yet thou. But bringing her to river walk tandoori is currently in my mind. Hahahahaha. Okay that's it for now. Am currently on my way to wrk n guess wad I'm early. I'm rdy in d train heading towards airport ;) gd ah... Hahahaha!!! Gooo sharonnnn!!!

MY LOVE

I'm her baby, she my shawty

Oooooooooh we rockin (Eh!)

We got our shit all up in the press

And they hatin

Now who's right there

Every time you cry

Go to sleep

And wake up on your side

Endless love

I always provide

They hatin' on us

And you should know why

But who's been lovin' you lately?

Who's willin' to go half on the baby?

Who, who, who's tryin' to flag our ship?

They just tryin' to get the love you give

But baby

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Oh, oh, oh

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh

So they don't understand

Why I never leave you

Explain my love

I don't need to

Got everybody way up

In our business

'Cause leaving each other

Stay on they wish list

I see them reaching every time

You call me baby

They on my back like a shirt

Get off me baby

They don't love me

Let 'em wonder why

Here to stay

And they goin' bye bye

Who's the one calling you baby?

Who's in love with yo ass like crazy?

Who, who, who's gonna flag down our ship?

Just tryin' to get the love you give

Baby

Girl my love is your love

And there ain't nothing in this world

That they can do to make me give you up

Ooo, ooo baby

You will always be my girl

So let 'em do whatever

Say whatever

'Cause I ain't givin' you up

No, no, no, no

Pretty baby

No, no, they don't know

No, no, they don't know

No, no, they don't know

No, no, they don't know

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Tell me what they know about my love (my love)

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

WELL THIS IS LIFE... HAHAHAHA...

Just because I’m losing doesn’t mean I’m lost

They gave me nothing but doubt

first they waited then hated then counted me out

Just because I’m losing doesn’t mean I’m stuck

They say I lost my way

but first I showed em then I sold em right in front of their face

Well this is the World that we living

one minute you the hero the next you the villain

we got up in this game just to try to make a living

we hit you with the truth while you watching television

but still these are the cards that we dealt

they kick you on the ground when you most need help

until you dried up and they sit you on the shelf

then you start to cry because you all by yourself

so just know if you are aware of the belt

the only way to excel is the soul that you sell

so I could care less about the clothes on myself

I’m trying to drive straight on a road made of nails

yeah, I got to pay the toll if I fell

or else it would be another story to tell

I’m getting to the door I can tell

I’m just waiting on the day till the glory prevails

All I know is keep going, sh-t don’t stop

until the huss double up put the click on top

used to wanna have the bricks on lock

til we went to prison saw we couldn’t pick them locks

easy decision now a n-gga think I lost my touch

listen if I aint the realest ever done it I aint off by much

so please don’t wake me up if I’m dreaming in the fast lane speedin’ no safety belt

and it’s a marathon pace yourself

in this race for wealth talkin’ sh-t just a waste of breath

chasing me like chasing your tail your never gon catch it

respect is something you never get if you never had it

I’m looking back and laughing this life of mine

bought me all the way here form my life of crime

just a constant reminder that the end I’ll be always the one who knows all see’s all

because…

Yeah, well these are my predictions

I’ll be on the top 40 with a big hit

travelling the World trying not to get sick

and I’ma get more friends on my friends on my friends list

and then after that I’ll be famous

and everyone I know will tell me that I’m changing

and then my cell phone will never stop ringing

and I’ll be all over magazine pages

yeah and they’ll play my songs till they boring

and if I ever do stop touring they treat me like a foreigner

Don’t believe me ask Lauren…

NEW SHOES

Hey honey

Cat got your tongue

Don't look so funny

Mister comedian

Joke's on you

And you're good at bets

So where's my money

I know you bet

I'd never make that move

So why's the house empty?

Light's off by the end of this week

I'll leave with what I came with baby

I'll take the dogs, you keep the mercedes

Cause I'm gone, I'm not fazed

I walk these roads with grace

And I'll wave with you behind me

With a new smile on my face

Cause I'm walking in new shoes now

I got a new song to sing

When I walk in the room every head turns

Every eye is on me

To bad you're not here to see it

And by the time you get this

I'll be so long gone and far

I'll send you a postcard

Aha I'll send you a postcard

Hey baby

You seen a ghost? this ain't yo lady

This is the chick that you held back now

All of the things you've said were crazy

I checked out my list and I feel good about it

I got the new haircut

The one that you said wouldn't look no good

Took that job you said I could not get

Wore that dress you said I'd never fit in

You're gone and I'm great

I got rid of your dead weight

And I'll wave at you behind me

With a new smile on my face

Cause I'm walking in new shoes now

I got a new song to sing

When I walk in the room every head turns

Every eye is on me

To bad you're not here to see it

And by the time you get this

I'll be so long gone and far

I'll send you a postcard

Aha... I'll send you a postcard

I SO LOVE THIS SONG MAN! DAMN!!! IT DOESN'T RELATE TO ANY CURRENT SITUATION OF MINE BUT AMAZING. IT SHOWS A WOMANS THROUGH ATTITUDE.. ITS LIKE  WOAAW!! BEYONCE IS LIKE D BEST!!! U GO GIRL!!!

Still In Love (Kissing You)

I'm so in love

I'm still in love

I've never been in love quite before

until I saw your face

and watching stars without you

my soul cries

my heaving heart

is full of pain

when we're apart

the aching

I'm kissing you

I'm kissing you

You're my father

you're my soldier

you protect me, boy you save me

you're my best friend

you're my husband

you are my doctor, counselor,

provider, professor, my everything

And I love you, I love you, I love you, yes I love you

I need you, I need you, I need you, I can't live without you

I trust you, I trust you, with every ounce of me

Just teach me, boy teach me, just take me

When we make love I can feel all your spirit

deep inside of me

Baby you're so pure

I'm Kissing you forever, and ever, and ever

I love Kissing you (kissing you, kissing you)

Boy I love everything about you baby

it's been so many years since we fell in love

we got something special baby

we can cry together

we can grow together

be ourselves together

and I love you more than music

yes I love you more than music

I'd rather be kissing you, oh

I'm kissing you oh (kissing you, kissing you)